Archive for December, 2009

“It’s A Starrett.”

Saturday, December 26th, 2009

I had — and still have — an ancient pair of wirecutters.  This thing goes through piano wire as if it were butter.  In an act of world-class blasphemy,  I sometimes use it to clip my toenails.  It’s a Starrett.

We used to go to Kaufman Industrial Supply in East Cambridge.  You went there when you needed something really good like a 24 gauge wood screw — that’d be the one that holds the cast-iron plate in the piano — or a Soss hinge.  And so off to Kaufman’s I went when I decided that ancient tool deserved a new set of jaws.

Walked in, dropped it on the counter.  “It needs new jaws.”  He picked it up, turned it over doubtfully.  Hesitantly, “I don’t know…” This simply wasn’t acceptable.  “It’s a Starrett.”   I spat it out.  “Oh,” very quietly.  A minute later, he re-emerged, shiny new parts in hand.

A Gift For Baby Jesus

Friday, December 25th, 2009

And that’s why they’re called wise men!

So take a tip from Helen:  May we use the word “merry” more than for just f*!&ing Christmas.

Signe Sends Solstice Greetings

Monday, December 21st, 2009


Special guest artist Signe Baumane sends Winter Solstice Greetings.  Visit her at http://www.signebaumane.com/

Copenhagen

Monday, December 21st, 2009

Guess who won.

Okay.  Chuck likes the line version.  Lucky likes the color version.  I was pretty finely balanced between the two, so here is the other version.  As some other cartoonist once said, “Indecision is a terrible thing.”

The Liebergrinch

Sunday, December 20th, 2009

Special Guest Artist: Colleen Nelson

Graffiti On A Poem By Margaret Atwood On A Painting By Edouard Manet

Saturday, December 19th, 2009

You see the painting,

olympia

Olympia, by Edouard Manet.

Pretty brazen, this chick.

Any attempt would require, well, Olympian efforts of seduction.

But is she more brazen than the the Poet?

Manet’s Olympia
By Margaret Atwood

She reclines, more or less,
Try that posture, it’s hardly languor.
Her right arm sharp angles.
With her left she conceals her ambush.
Shoes but not stockings,
how sinister. the flower
behind her ear is naturally
not real, of a piece
with the sofa’s drapery.
The windows (if any) are shut.
This is indoor sin.
Above the head of the (clothed) maid
is an invisible voice balloon: Slut.

But. Consider the body,
unfragile, defiant, the pale nipples
staring you right in the bull’s eye.
Consider also the black ribbon
around the neck. What’s under it?
A fine red threadline, where the head
was taken off and glued back on.
The body’s on offer,
but the neck’s as afar as it goes.

This is no morsel.
Put clothes on her and you’d have a schoolteacher,
the kind with the brittle whiphand.

There’s someone else in this room.
You, Monsieur Voyeur.
As for that object of yours
she’s seen those before, and better.

I, the head, am the only subject
of this picture.
You, Sir, are furniture.
Get stuffed.

Have I had this Olympia?

No matter, Margaret has it in for me.

I, my maleness, my male gaze are the malefactor’s here.

But methinks the room a mite crowded.

The servant, this cold-gazed dame, myself,

Who else?

The painter, of course.  No scorn for him.  Hell,

If it wasn’t for him, she wouldn’t have a poem.

None for Olympia, attended by her maid.

And to think, in this tiny room, with its bed,

Its easel,

Its artist,

His paints,

And a voyeur, no less,

We still have room, packed as we are, cheek by jowl,

For Madame La Poete.

Come in, come in, my dear.

The more the merrier.

Just don’t let on, my dear

That you were there, too.

The Poetry Corner

Sunday, December 13th, 2009

soulOfThePoet

Kind of like the blues, I suppose.

Heard On The Radio

Thursday, December 10th, 2009

womenAndChildren

Well, part of it, anyway.