Al Haig, supporter and defender of mass murder and torture, particularly in El Salvador. He was what Ed Sanders calls a basmanophile, a person who loves violence. Here’s what I said about him at the time.
Al Haig and his dog, Junta
(Al Haig is walking his dog Junta. Al wears military clothing including stars on his arm and a general’s hat. The dog may be played by an actor wearing a large spiked collar and perhaps some sort of fangs. The dog is viscious and threatens the audience. He snaps and barks and raises his leg to piss on them. Al, at the other end of the leash is unconcerned.)
Al : Hi. I’m Al Haig, Vicar of Foriegn Affairs. This is my dog, Junta. He’s my friend. And I believe in sticking by my friends. He makes me feel secure. I can go to sleep at night knowing no one will steal my El Salvador. Yeah, he’s a strong dog, a good dog. He’s no pushover. Aint that right, Junta?
But of course there’ve been problems with him. People are complaining that he’s been biting innocent people. Some times he drags people off and no one knows where. They just–disappear. ‘Course it’s all just talk. Yer a good boy, aintcha Junta? A while back, people were complaining
that he bit a bunch of nuns. A bunch of Holy Sisters, imagine! You wouldn’t do a thing like that, wouldja Junta? I’ll bet they did something foolish, like try to run from him.
They say he’s bit 20,000 people. But I don’t believe it. They deserved it anyway, didn’t they Junta?
People say I ought to be more strict with him. Put him on a shorter leash, or have his fangs pulled. But I couldn’t do that to my friend. You gotta stick by your friend. No, it doesn’t matter what they say, he’s just my good dog Junta.